When we sit down to talk about estate planning, the default assumption is almost always the same.
“Everything goes to the children in equal shares.”
Nice, clean, and simple.
But, as we all know, family life is rarely quite that straightforward.
Sometimes, a clean 50/50 split just doesn’t make sense.
Perhaps one child has given up their career to become your primary carer in later life. Or perhaps another has already received significant financial help from you over the years to get on the property ladder or start a business.
In these cases, leaving unequal shares of your estate—say, 60% to one child and 40% to the other—might actually be the most logical and fair approach.
Let me be absolutely clear: this is perfectly legitimate estate planning. It is your wealth, and you are entirely within your rights to distribute it however you see fit.
But just because it is legal, doesn’t mean it is without its challenges.
Unequal inheritances are one of the most common catalysts for family friction.
A disappointed beneficiary doesn’t just cause a few awkward silences around the Christmas dinner table. If they feel genuinely slighted, they can actively contest the probate process.
This is where things can get incredibly messy.
A contested Will can completely freeze an estate. It can drag the administration process out for months, or even years, causing immense stress for everyone involved.
Worse still, the legal fees involved in defending a contested probate can rapidly erode the very wealth you spent a lifetime building.
So, how do we navigate this?
If you are going to implement an unequal split, you cannot just leave it to chance. We need to head off the conflict before it even has the chance to begin.
The absolute best way to do this is through clear communication and robust documentation.
Alongside your Will, you need to leave a very detailed Letter of Wishes.
This shouldn’t just be a cold, legalistic document. It needs to be written in your own words, explaining exactly why you have made the decision you have.
If you are leaving a larger share to your daughter to reflect the years she spent caring for you, write that down. If you are leaving a smaller share to your son because you already paid his house deposit, spell it out.
When a disappointed beneficiary sees the rationale in black and white, written directly by you, it removes the ambiguity. It also makes it incredibly difficult for a legal team to argue that you didn’t know what you were doing, or that you were somehow coerced by the other sibling.
Good estate planning isn’t just about mitigating tax. It is about preserving family harmony after you are gone.
If you are considering a structure like this, we need to do the hard work now. Let’s get the blueprint drawn up, stress-tested, and fully documented.
If you’d like to review your current plans to make sure your wishes are truly watertight, please do get in touch.
